To contentment in a broke-down palace

I am.....content.....at least for the moment. :) I truly am......

the future of two

Yes, we all know I want to move to Bend. I don't think I have to explain that again. The change, the new, the different, it's what I crave right now. (unless my cravings are the misinterpreted tick-tocks of my somewhat latent biological clock)
I have a strong(stubborn) and driven(obsessed) personality. When I decide I want to do something, watch out. So of course, I've been perusing craigslist for rental houses in Bend, taking the next step to get my RN so I can work wherever I want, and talking about our imminent move to anyone who will listen.
Enter the husband. We have been married for two years, together for six.five. We own a home(as much as you can own anything these days), we want to own a bike shop/brewpub someday, we want to eventually buy a place with a couple acres. We never made a plan, we just discussed, and dreamed. Now, I want a plan, a goal, a point in the near future that I can look forward to and work toward. So, of course I've been dropping not-so subtle hints frequently about my sincere interest in moving. Erich, per his usual, doesn't say much, however has expressed that he thinks I'm nuts for looking at rentals when a move wouldn't be possible for at least two years. And lately, I've gotten the idea that he doesn't necessarily want to move to Bend as much as I do. Ok, fine, I can deal with that, because I know that eventually Erich would probably like to move, he just needs time to process. He needs time to process pretty much any decision. That's why he's perfect for me, his deliberate analysis of a given situation nicely balances my tendencies toward impulsivity.
So.......now what?
I guess I move forward with my goal, with the understanding that the compromises of marriage might demand certain addendums to my plan for us.
For instance, we drove home from my parents yesterday and popped over to Whitmore for fun. The drive was beautiful with all the colors of fall. The Fern Rd. property(owned by the in-laws, and offered to us for the construction of what would be my dream home) grabs me everytime I see it, I don't know how, I don't know why but I fall in love with that place everytime we go there. I like projects, I love dreaming up all the things we could do to make that property our own private retreat. Even the thought of clearing brush and tending big burn piles in the crisp fall air makes me excited. And building a house that would be exactly how I wanted it??? My dream come true. Let's do it! (See, impulsive)
I could definitely see that as part of our future. But how about this, let's move to Bend for a few years. Then come back and settle down. Or maybe we don't. Maybe we love Bend so much that we buy a place up there and we are just as happy there as we could ever hope to be.
How will we ever know unless we boldly take a step in one of those directions? We have to take a step in some direction....I vote for North.
Or I guess we could just get pregnant. Maybe that would settle me down. :)

I've got my best shoes on, I'm ready to go

I would pack up our stuff and move tomorrow, I would. However, its not that simple when you own a house, when you need to finish school, when you have a life seven years in the making to wrap up into a portable u-haul sized package. I can't stop thinking about moving, I'm craving the new environment, the new community, the new experience. I'm tired of seeing the same things day after day, I'm tired of knowing half of the people I come into contact with, I'm tired of being disappointed because life here doesn't seem to satisfy me anymore. So, let's go, or at least get our feet moving in that direction.

So I'm concocting a to-do list for our eventual move. (I love making lists, I don't usually follow them, but I really like making them.)

1. The purging continues, I'm deciding what things are essential to me, what things I can easily let go of. The "letting go" list is getting rather long. Without even realizing it, I've found myself surrounded by mass market crap that I haven't used, let alone looked at since we moved in to this house. So, it goes out the door. There's still plenty of stuff left over, let me tell ya! And it's all really dusty....so I bought a can of pledge. Consolidating when the house is somewhat clean seems easier.

2. Need to get my RN. I love being a nurse but the fact is, being an LVN means you get less pay and work harder(in alot of cases) than your RN counterparts. Not to mention, there is a lack of respect when they see LVN on your name badge. So, today I submitted my application for re-enrollment at Shasta College. I need to take Microbiology, then I'll be eligible for the upgrade-program to get my RN. This should take approximately three semesters. I really hope there is no waiting list, other-wise, I'll have to explore other options. Once I put my mind to doing something, I don't like waiting. Maybe I'll commute to COS in Weed. That wouldn't be so bad, right?

3. Save money, pay off bills, conserve my resources! I am horrible at saving money, always have been. The fact is, moving, even if it's local, is expensive. I would like to have at least $5000 in our savings. Right now, I have $200. EEP! This will be the hardest thing to do for me, I am a spender. I'm gonna need some back-up. That'll be Erich's job, frequent reminders and possibly physical punishment if I can't control myself. :)

4. Learn to play my fiddle. This will be a good distraction and deterrent from spending money or wasting all day looking at rentals and job postings on bend's craigslist. I will also start crocheting again and try to diminish my extensive collection of yarn. Craft therapy and purging all in one.

Ok, this is a good start.......let's get to it.